I Hate Myself For Loving You
by ShotAcrossTheSky
Summary: Leah finally decides to leave La Push.She returns six years later,and has turned into a completely different woman.What will happen when Sam sees her again,but only finds out she’s completely over him?Will he be hurt?Or relieved?Rating may go up.Sam/Leah
1. Heavily Broken

Alright! So this is my first Twilight Saga story. I originally wanted to write and Edward/Bella one, but I just got so attached to Leah after Breaking Dawn, and I felt people hated her for no reason, so I wrote this instead after having a dream about it. There will be a lot of flashbacks, so just to warn you on that. Rating may go up later. Each Chapter will be names after a song, and a part of the song will always be in the chapter. So yea. If I repeat artist too much. I'm sorry. Write your own story. And yes, the beginning is from the end of Eclipse.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters! Except Gabi, she's mine, well not really she's my friend Sese's lol, but yes! She's not Stephenie Meyers.

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"Jacob do you think this is going to take too much longer?" I demanded impatiently.

Like anyone in the pack I knew everything. I knew why he came here, and though I knew for a fact all he wanted was to be left alone, I still went against his will and forced my company on him. I had to put a stop to this. Believe it or not I still had some particle of me that hoped to one day become sane, but Jacob's thoughts about his beloved leech lover were ridiculous! I couldn't stand it anymore! His Every thought made me nauseous, and through I refused to admit to him and even myself, that I knew exactly what he was going through, and worst of all—feeling, I had to at least try and persuade him to stop.

"Jump off a cliff Leah" he calmly said, pointing to the cliff at his feet.

"Really kid" I said spreading myself onto the ground next to him "You have no idea how hard this is for me"

"For you?" he started "You have to be the most self-absorbed person alive Leah. I'd hate to shatter the dream world you live in, the one where the sun is orbiting the place where you stand so I won't tell you how little I care what your problem is. Go. Away."

I rolled my eyes. "Just look at this from my perspective for a minute, okay?" I asked making as if I hadn't heard a single word he had just spoken. Yea I know I was in fact self-absorbed. I had to be. No one else cared for, or about me, well…not anymore. And if you're thinking about my dear beloved mother, you're wrong. She was so excited helping Emily plan her dream wedding with…well she just didn't really give a rats ass. So now it was up to me to make myself feel important. Okay, so I went a little overboard sometimes, but what was the harm if everyone thought I was a heartless bitch anyway?! I then heard Jacob laugh. "Stop snorting and pay attention." I snapped.

"If I pretend to listen will you leave?" he asked, my face automatically forming a scowl. I stared at him as he looked at my face, and I suddenly remembered those times so far away, when Jacob and all the other boys in the reservation would just drool whenever they saw me. I knew for a fact none of them thought of me like that. Well sometimes…._he_ did. I felt my scowl, coordinated with my temper, heat up.

"This is making me sick Jacob. Can you imagine what this feels like to me? I don't even like Bella Swan. And you've got me grieving over this leech lover like I'm in lover with her too. Can you see where that might be a little confusing? I dreamt about kissing her last night! What the hell am I supposed to do with that?"

"Do I care?"

"I can't stand being in your head anymore! Get over her already! She's going to marry that thing. He's going to try to change her into one of them! Time to move on boy."

"Shut Up" he growled. Well if I wasn't going to win this argument I was going to take this beautiful opportunity to make it enjoyable, you know? Fun. Well, for me at least.

"He'll probably just kill her anyway." I sneered "All the stories say that happens more often than not. Maybe a funeral will be a better closure than a wedding. Ha." I smiled smug. If everything else I had told him didn't get to him, I knew this definitely would. Hopefully he would finally realize that I was right and would finally out the whole pack out of its misery. The role of pathetic ex-significant was already taken. I watched intrigued as he closed his eyes, concentrated on trying to stay together and not phase. My smile only got bigger as he opened his eyes and looked at me. It was only a joke.

"If you're upset about gender confusion, Leah…" he said. Slow. Emphasizing each and every word that came through his lips. "How do you think the rest of us like looking at Sam through your eyes? It's bad enough that Emily has to deal with _your_ fixation. She doesn't need us guys panting after him too." I immediately felt the pain shoot across my face.

He had me.

And what was worse was that I knew he was right. I scrambled to my feet, paused to spit in his direction, then turned and began making a run for the woods, my body trembling, waiting for the monster to rip itself out of my skin.

"You missed" I heard him say. And that did it.

A tremor ran down my spine before I heard a tearing sound. Shit. Well, there went my clothes. I exploded. My grey fur replaced my bronze skin. Mine and Jacob's 'conversation' kept playing over and over in my head. **It's bad enough that Emily has to deal with **_**your**_** fixation. She doesn't need us guys panting after him too. **A deep growl formed in my chest. Jacob's house soon came into view. Outside, Billy black was in his chair looking at me, his face somewhat uneasy. I stopped at the edge of the forest and stared back at him breathing heavily. A new emotion flashed across his face. Concern. He tilted his head to the side and then back upright, signaling me to go to the back of the small house, before he went back inside.

I surreptitiously made my way to the back door, my eyes scanning the area for any human who didn't know the Quileute secret. I stood in front of the back door. I heard the locks click, the knob turn. The door opened, revealing Billy with a pile of clothes on his lap.

"Here. These are Rachel's." he told me, instructing me to lower my head "You two are about the same size." I nodded my head grateful, and he took the opportunity to place the clothes on my muzzle. He then closed the door giving me some privacy to phase back and dress. I lowered my head, letting the clothes fall to the ground. I groaned in pure frustration and circled the Black's backyard a couple time to cool off. I walked back to the door, took a deep breath and closed my eyes, concentrating. I then felt myself turn back into my human form, and exhaled. I quickly picked up the t-shirt and jeans from the ground and dressed.

"You decent?" Billy's deep voice asked from the other side of the door. I opened it and nodded.

"Yeah." I whispered looking down at my feet to avoid his gaze.

"You—uh…You wanna…talk?" he asked like any other concerned father. I finally met his dark brown eyes and shook my head. It wasn't that I didn't confide in Billy Black. No. On the contrary, he had become like a father to Seth and I since ours passed away. Now _he _helped my little brother and I understand and 'embrace' our new way of life. But as any other 'normal' father-daughter relationship, there were still some things I just couldn't talk to him about. This was definitely one of them.

He took a deep breath. "Alright" he told me. I knew he knew what it was more or less about. He wasn't exactly okay with it, but he judged me less than anyone else. "I'll call you mother so she won't worry. Now…you go ahead and rest in Jacob's room." He said already wheeling away from me and heading for the phone.

"Thank you" was my simple answer before making my way to Jacob's room. Being here was a million times better than being at home. My mother was just as disappointed about my 'fixation' as anybody. **"Don't you want your cousin Emily to be happy?" **she asks me as if she wasn't aware of what had happened. She would just give me long speeches and asked a thousand questions. Billy didn't, so I definitely that I was better off here.

I slowly walked into the small room and strode my way over to the bed. I crawled in and sat with my knees pulled up into my chest, while I wrapped my arms around my legs and rested my chin on my knees. I leaned against the wall and looked out the window. This all just wasn't what I had expected. I grew up thinking I was normal, that the stories dad used to tell Seth and I were just stupid superstitions. I was happy when I was in high school. All the guys thought I was beautiful, but after they noticed I wasn't the easy type, they stopped bugging me. So they were 'popular' and I wasn't. I didn't want to be and I didn't mind.

I tried to make myself as invisible as possible. I didn't exactly like the harassment offered by guys. Then I saw him. Sam Uley. I flinched as his name crossed my mind. Of course I had thought of him, but I had refused to think or say his name. When I saw…Sam, everything changed. I'd known Sam for a long time. With a population of roughly 400 people, it was embarrassing if you didn't know everyone by name. We grew up together.

My father always helped Sam's mother out since she was raising him on her own. We were best friends in elementary school, but when he moved on to middle school, I was left in fourth grade without him, and we naturally drifted apart. When I hit middle school we both had different friends already but that didn't stop me from having a crush on him. But again, he moved on to high school, and I was left in seventh grade. I moved on. The crush I had on him was still there. But I naturally had crushes on other guys, and I eventually forgot about him.

Then I hit high school. Like I said: All the guys thought I was beautiful, but after they noticed I wasn't the easy type, they stopped bugging me. So they were 'popular' and I wasn't. I didn't want to be and I didn't mind. I tried to make myself as invisible as possible, and I had only made one true friend. Gabriella. She was the best friend I could ever ask for. She was probably the only white kid from New York in the reservation. But I greeted her into the Reservation and then, we became inseparable. But back to my original point. I didn't exactly like the harassment offered by guys. But halfway thorough the year, I saw Sam again…and I didn't want to be invisible anymore. He wasn't the dorky little boy I played with on the beach, or the gangly little kid I used to play house with. He wasn't even the little boy who proposed to me when he was ten, and being the grossed out seven year old I was, I naturally said no. Now I wanted Sam to notice me. But trying to be invisible what a bad habit to break and I was left invisible. But yet…by some incredible miracle…he noticed me.

**Everything was so peaceful. That's why I liked walking home. Nature soothed me, final exams were coming up, and the whole school was hysterical, what with prom and graduation coming up for the seniors, so after a long day of any freshman day, it was very relaxing. I sung softly, the tune barely audible to myself, and then suddenly I heard rustling in the woods, scaring me slightly. What if there was a wolf or something that wanted to eat me? I looked around me but there was nothing. Then the next thing I felt was something on my shoulder, and I gasped loudly before clamping both hands over my mouth. **

"**Did I scare you? I'm sorry. Are you okay?" he asked me with a smile.**

"**Yea" I whispered "yea I'm fine I just…I though I heard something." I said a little louder.**

"**Well…you **_**are**_** walking at the edge of the forest…there's bound to be some noise." He told me with a nervous chuckle. "You do…remember me…right?" he asked with slightly raised eyebrows.**

"**Of course. You know Uley, you're kinda hard to forget.'' I said now completely calm, but nervous at the same time. "I thought you'd be the one to forget me." I said with a smirk.**

"**Oh no" he said placing his hands in his pockets and walking beside me "Can't forget the Clearwater's. You're dad makes the best fish fry in the whole reservation." I laughed and shook my head.**

"**Is that the only reason you remember me?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.**

"**No, not at all. Although you're name **_**is**_** supposed to be Lee Lee Uley." He said smirking.**

"**You…still remember that?" I asked **

"_**You **_**still remember that?" he asked looking at me slightly stunned.**

"**Of course. How can I forget the first time a guy proposed to me when I was seven, and by Sam Uley to top it off!" I said giggling.**

"**Well you were pretty cute back then."**

"**What do you mean **_**'were'**_**?" I asked pretending to be offended**

"**No come on don't get mad. I'm just joking, besides…you have quite a number of guys dying to go out with you." He told me and I looked up smiling at him. I shook my head.**

"**You mean the preps and jocks?" he nodded "Not really my type." I stated.**

"**Great! Well I mean…" he paused "listen, I was wondering. Do you want to go out to eat or something?" he asked coolly **

"**Right now?" I asked with a raised brow. He laughed.**

"**No not now, I meant like Friday, or Saturday night." I stopped walking**

"**Are you asking me out on a date?" I asked with a slight smile**

"**Well yea." he laughed "Yea a date." he admitted with a chuckle. I eyed him playfully, the smile never leaving my lips.**

"**Aren't you a junior?" he nodded "So why do you want to go out with me. I'm a freshman remember?" I said and started walking again.**

"**You don't act like a freshman. Certainly don't look like one."**

"**Won't your friends tease you anyway?" I asked with a smirk**

"**Nah, I don't care what they tell me."**

"**Okay then." I answered as we arrived to the front of my house.**

"**Great, uh…I'll pick you up Friday at seven.'' he said**

"**Friday at seven sounds good" **

"**Alright." he said excitedly. "See you at school tomorrow?"**

"**Definitely." I told him with a smile **

"**Awesome, see ya tomorrow." He told me and then took off jogging towards his house. I bit my lip and smiled, making my way in the house. **

And the rest was history. That's at least was the least painful memory. Of course, all the other memories began shuffling though my head involuntarily. The day he asked me to be his girlfriend on prom night, which we were supposed to go to since he was a junior but we decided to just go out to eat with friends making that our third date. Our first kiss only three days after being together at the cliffs. And of course…our first time at his senior prom.

"**Lee we don't have to do this." He told me with furrowed eyebrows.**

"**You were the one who brought it up and asked me if I was ready, and I said yes." I reminded him taking the room key from his fingers, and sliding it in the slot above the door handle, waiting for the light to turn green. As soon as it did, I opened the door and flipped on the light switch.**

"**So…where does your mother think you are tonight? I mean, after coming to prom with me."**

"**Well…" I said and looked around the hotel room. "She thinks I'm heading back to Gabi's and spending the night there."**

"**Didn't we see Gabi and her boyfriend in the lobby getting a room?" **

"**Yea." I said turning to him smiling widely.**

"**You like the room?' he asked, a nervous tone to his voice.**

"**I love it." I told him with a smile as I walked to him.**

"**Good, consider it a one year anniversary gift."**

"**You remembered?" I asked biting my lip.**

"**Of course, how could I forget?''**

**He let out a slight chuckle and pulled me to his chest by my waist, kissing me softly. I smiled slightly into the kiss and wrapped my arms around his neck, which thanks to the four inch heels I was wearing, was easier to do. He pulled me closer to him and I slid my hands down his chest. I grabbed his blazer and slipped it out of his arms. He unwrapped his arms from my waist and let the blazer fall to the floor. I slipped out of my heels and stood on my tippy toes, and took a step back towards the queen sized bed. He began unbuttoning his shirt and let that drop to the floor as well, exposing his extremely chiseled chest and abs, then reached for the sipper of my dress and unzipped it. I slowly pulled away from the kiss and smiled softly at him. I slipped my arm out of my one shouldered dress and let it slip to the floor circling my feet, and leaving me in only my nude strapless bra, and nude lace boy shorts. I bit my lip nervously and looked up at Sam who seemed to be in awe. I reached to his belt and unbuckled it; the he reached the button on his pants undoing it and slid out of them, kicking his shoes of at the same time. I stood still and looked at him as he did the same.**

"**You're beautiful." he whispered**

**I felt my cheeks redden and he placed the hair out of my face and behind my ear. I looked up at him again and before I knew it his lips were on mine again. He lifted me up, and I immediately wrapped my legs around his waist, arms around his neck. I kissed him passionately as he did the same. He walked to the bed and laid me down gently on in. I pulled away from the kiss and scooted back to lay my head on the pillow, never taking my eyes off him. He smiled softly at me and crawled to me. He placed his hands on either side of my head and I reached up to kiss him. At the same time I reached behind my back and I unhooked my bra. When Sam heard the fabric hit the floor he pulled away from the kiss and looked down at me. I bit my lip and reached down to his boxers, pulling them off as best as I could with his help. Then he did the same with my boy shorts. Now we were completely naked, and the nerves were finally kicking in. he slowly reached his hand toward my bare black stomach and traced his fingertips over it, sending goose bumps throughout my body. I could feel and definitely see he was fully…ready, and I…well I was ready. He continued to run his fingers over my body, our breaths already heavy.**

"**Are you positively sure you want to do this?"**

"**I am. I love you." I whispered.**

"**I love you too, but I don't have to do this to prove that you love me."**

"**I know—I know, but I really do want to. I want you to be the first, and we both know this has to happen sooner or later."**

"**Yea true." He told me and I smiled softly at him. "Are you ready?" he asked in a whisper.**

"**Yes." I answered. He looked down and I could feel him coming closer to my body. I took a deep breath and placed my hands on his shoulders, then, he finally thrusted into me. A groan escaping his lips, a gasp escaping mine.**

That was the best night of my entire life. I was in love. It felt funny—being in love. But I liked it. I knew Sam was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. But then he disappeared. I of course went crazy. Mrs. Uley and I searched everywhere for him, people began to talk, rumoring he had dies in some sort of freak accident, making me even more hysterical. He appeared a couple of weeks later, but he wouldn't talk to me. I could see he wanted to, but couldn't. Then one day he came over to my house in the middle of the night, he tried to explain, but something in him always told him to stop. It was the most infuriating thing ever! But we loved each other, so we tried to work it out.

Emily came over one day. I was so happy to have her over. Emily was only my second cousin, but she was like the sister I never had and always dreamed of having. So to have Sam meet her was very exciting, so he came over, and as soon as I saw him look at her…I knew it was over. Everything. Over. He looked at her with adoration, love. Sure he looked at me with those expressions too, but now with nearly all the intensity he had when he looked at her. He now only looked at me with lust, sometimes even indifferently, as if I were just another girl in an ocean of people. My heart had more than broken. It had shattered. I'd given everything to him…everything! And in return, I got shreds of my heart. His promises of loving me forever, of getting married, traveling, and having kids…they were gone…vanished. All broken.

I didn't understand what had happened or why. All I know was that I was pissed. Especially pissed at Emily. She was like my sister! How could she have done this to me?! How could have Sam done this to me? I didn't sleep, or eat, or even go out of my house for days. I would lock myself in my room and curl up in my bed and cried for weeks. Cried and cried until there were no more tears, and I'd fallen asleep. My parents and even my brother begged for me to get out of my room. But I didn't. I couldn't. I wouldn't. My father finally put his foot down. He took the knob from my door off. That was funny now that I think of it. He yanked me out of my room, made me take a shower, eat and kicked me out of my house until I stopped crying. And with Gabi, my bestest friend in the whole wide world's help...I did. And slowly I began to recover, not fully, no I knew that would never happen, but I was on my way, and I became a moody harpy bitch.

One day, after hearing that Emily wanted me to be a bridesmaid, my temper finally reached its point. How could she ask that of me? Was she being serious? Being the bridesmaid at the man that I was deeply in love with's wedding?!!! I was pacing back in forth in the kitchen yelling my head off in front of my mom, dad, and Seth. When Seth told me to stop, he looking angry already, and then when mom told me to calm down…I snapped. I don't know how or why but suddenly I was in someone else's body, I was in a wolf's body I freaked out, no longer angry but confused and scared. I looked at my parents…but all I saw was Seth in a wolf form too…and my father on the floor clutching his chest. I know some people blame me for my father's death, and one of those many people is me. So now I was suddenly thrusted into what I had believed to be a mythical world. Billy explained things, told Seth and I stories, and I finally understood why Sam had 'fallen' in love with Emily. But not even that eased the pain. I agreed to be Emily's bride's maid. I realized…it wasn't her fault, but that didn't stop me from wishing it would have been the other way around.

It was embarrassing having all the guys, especially Sam, know all my thoughts, all my feelings. But what could I do? And now…Now I was here in Jacob's room reminiscing the wonderful life I had once lived, while less than a mile away Sam was still living a wonderful life with the woman who was practically my sister. I closed my eyes and didn't even bother to stop the tears or quiet sobs.

"Leah?" I gasped softly and quickly wiped away my tears, then turned towards the door.

"S-Sam? What is it? What's going on?" I asked alarmed, with furrowed eyebrows.

"No!" he strained a laugh "No I…" he cleared his throat "I heard what Jacob told you." He said softly, "I was uh, out with the other guys making rounds when you phased."

Great. "Oh." I whispered "So then…why exactly are you here?"

"Look, Leah." He began, approaching me.

"Don't Sam." I told him getting up quickly from the bed and going over to stand in the corner, facing Jacob's poorly stocked closet. I crossed my arms over my chest and felt my eyes get watery.

"I'm sorry, really, I—I don't know how many times I have to tell you so that you'll believe me."

"I know, I do believe you, I do. But that's the problem. I _don't _want to believe you. I want you to smile and say: "No I'm just kidding Lee Lee…I do love you"." I said whispering out the last part.

"Lee Lee," he said softly, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Don't! Please don't call me that…don't touch me" I told him, tears running down my face now. I ducked around his arm and went to sit on the bed looking down. "How can you act like this?" I asked looking up at him with a disgusted face.

"Act like what?"

"Like this! As if nothing happened between us…ever! You know damn well just how many things happened!"

"I know. I know, but Lee—"

"You can't control this! I know! Damn it!" I said through clenched teeth "I've heard this over and over again Sam!" I yelled walking back to the corner, tears still escaping my eyes.

"Leah…I do love you" I looked up at him "You know I do, it's…it's just not like that anymore."

"Then what the fuck is it like?!" he didn't say anything, he just looked down, ashamed. "I hate those damn leeches."

"It's not their fault."

"Are you serious?!" I asked turning to him wide eyed "They're the reason we turned into this!"

"Yes. I know." he said "look they've proven they're not here to cause any trouble haven't they?"

"Yea, except for the fact that they want to turn that little leech lover into one of them and break the treaty!"

"You know Edward wants everything but that for bells." I glared at him.

"So you're letting them off the hook?"

"I never said that either. My duty…our duty, is to protect our tribe, no matter what." I looked down at my feet.

"**I swear to you Lee Lee, nothing will ever happen to you…I'll protect you as long as I live." **

The promise he had made me what seemed ages ago played in my head, also broken.

"Tell me…Sam." I whispered looking up at his face as I moved closer to him. "Do you still love me?" I slowly, carefully, placed my hand on his bare hot chest, where his heart was "Really, truly…love me?" I asked not sure if he wanted to look up at him, much less hear his answer.

" Lee Lee." He whispered reaching up to hold my hand, the one on his chest.

I looked up at him with furrowed eyebrows. When I heard him call me by my old nickname, the one he had given me when we were just kids, and with that tone of affection, tears clouded my eyes again and I stood up on my tippy toes. I pressed my lips softly to his. I felt like I was as cold as those leeches, and now the warmth of Sam's lips was making its way through my body again. Then I felt whole again, felt as if nothing had ever happened, and we were back in high school again. He kissed me back the way he did after the first time he told me he loved me, and I in return was in love all over again. But within a heart beat, I was back to feeling cold. I felt him push me away, my body slamming into the wall behind me. In front of me, Sam stood glaring at me, his hands balled up into fists at his sides.

"Don't you dare…ever do that again." He told me in a deep angry voice that made me flinch.

"I—I'm sorry." Great. I was the one apologizing now.

"How many times have I told you Leah? It's not like high school anymore. You're not my girlfriend. I don't love you, not like that, now you're more, well, more like a…sister." He told me slowly calming down, and I in return, cringed at his words.

"Great." I said through clenched teeth "That's what I've always wanted to be," I whispered "your fucking sister." The words came out cold. My body began to vibrate, eyes watery. He sighed and walked to me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to his chest. I felt so vulnerable and broken, that instead of pushing his away after hurting me once more, I just automatically wrapped my arms around him too and softly cried into his chest.

"I truly, truly, am sorry Lee Lee. From the bottom of my heart, but you'll move on. I know you will." He said placing his cheek at the top of my head.

"I can't." I told him sobbing softly now. He pulled away from me slightly and looked down to meet my eyes.

"Can't or won't?" he asked rhetorically. I looked at him with furrowed eyebrows and thought about it. Maybe…Maybe he was right…

"Sam!" Seth yelled bursting through the door. We immediately pulled away from each other. I looked at Seth wide eyed.

"What is it Seth?" Sam asked coolly, again, as if nothing had just happened.

"It's Jacob. He's leaving." He told him alarmed. Sam took a deep breath and looked down deciding what to do.

"Alright…stay here. I'll go talk to him."

"He phased, and he's running."

"Great. Just—Just stay here." He said leaving the room immediately.

"Are you ok Leah?" my younger brother asked me.

"No I don't think so." I whispered to him as I sat on the bed, tears clouding my eyes again.

"What is it?" he asked walking to sit next to me. Ha. As if he didn't know already.

"Nothing, just…you wouldn't understand." I told him biting my lip to keep it from trembling.

"Aww I'm sorry Leah." He told me wrapping his arms around me. I smiled faintly and hugged him back, pressing my cheek to the top of his head. "Is there anything I can do to help?" he asked

"No. No I don't expect you to know how to fix a broken heart."

_Everyday I sit here waiting  
Everyday just seems so long  
And now I've had enough of all the hating  
Do we even care, it's so unfair  
Any day it'll all be over  
Everyday there's nothing new  
And now I just try to find some hope  
To try and hold onto  
But it starts again  
It'll never end_

_I'm heavily broken  
And I don't know what to do  
Can't you see that I'm choking  
And I can't even move  
When there's nothing left to say  
What can you do  
I'm heavily broken  
And there's nothing I can do_

_

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_Ok! Well there's the first chapter! I'm so excited! That flashback there about prom…yea I was going to make that a full blown lemon, but I have a couple friends who are a little sensitive. *coughs*Sese!*coughs* But no worries. There _**will**_ be lemons in the future, so rating may go up. Read and review, and I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as possible.

-ShotAcrossTheSky


	2. How Do I Live Without You

Hi everyone! I'm really, really, really, really sorry I haven't updated in a while after I said I'd have it in two weeks, but my internet was down. It was excruciating! But i just got it back!!! -insert happy dance here- So now i give you the second chapter of this wonderful story. Oh and me and Sese discovered that I actually did come up with Gabi's character. Soo...HA! Take that SESE!!!! :D Oh and, yes. The whole chapter is in bold because it's a flashback. Tats is also the reason why it is much shorter. Third chapter should be up soon depending on the reviews. It is sitting in my document manager as we speak, and the fourth is in the works. Enjoy!

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**"Oh sweetie you look gorgeous!" I looked at myself in the mirror. I couldn't deny the obvious. I _was_ beautiful. The dark purple dress fit me perfectly, showing off the perfection of my breasts, before flowing down from underneath my bust. I looked like a Grecian goddess...if they were Quileute. "Come on Say something." my mom begged**

"**I like my hair." I told her quietly. My hair was long, since Jacob let me grow it when I joined his pack. It was waved beautifully and was slightly pinned on the sides.**

"**Good." my mother said with a smile "Now come on, we're going to be late!" **

**I let her drag me off.**

**I felt numb. In the past year I was beginning to do much better. But still, the unity of the love of my life and my cousin, who was practically my sister was something I perhaps would never get over. It was something I couldn't avoid either since I had long promised to be part of it. Fuck! I cursed the fucking day I said yes. So now I was stuck in a stupid dress, having the worst time of my life, waiting for the fucking wedding march to start.**

"**You ok?" Jake asked as he stood beside me looking extremely handsome in a black tux.**

"**So far so good. I am a little nauseous though."**

"**Well...don't throw up on me. Do you know how people would react to having the best man and maid of honor covered in puke?" he asked with a wide smile.**

"**Now** **_that_** **would make a beautiful wedding memory." I answered, slightly smiling. His smile saddened a little as he saw my troubled expression.**

"**It'll be ok Lee. You'll see, in a couple years...you won't remember this at all, I promise." I turned to look at him.**

"**I'm leaving." I whispered **

"**What?" His face was overcome by surprise.**

"**After the reception. Me and Gabi are leaving. I'm not asking for your permission Jacob, I'm really sorry, but you have to understand."**

"**Leah—" the wedding march playing on the piano filled the small chapel. And so the walk to my death sentence began.**

**I always dreamed about this moment. I would be walking down the aisle. Sam would be waiting at the end of it looking utterly delicious in a black tux. But never, ever in a million years did I dream I would be wearing a bridesmaid's dress. Our eyes connected and Sam had that loving look on his face, the one I dreamed about. I knew he was thinking about it too. I could see the happiness in his face that the pure imagination brought to him. Me walking down the aisle towards him. But I could see the anguish in his eyes. When the tears began to collect, I looked away, my heart weighed down by one-hundred tons of sadness, and devastation. **

**I zoned out for most of the wedding and tried to think about the future; how my best friend in the whole entire female existence and I would spend our time in New York, what job I would get, what our loft looked like, would I even adapt to the city? There were millions and millions of people! **

**My mother's sobs snapped me out of my trance. I looked over at her and she was smiling, trails of tears staining her made up face.**

**I rolled my eyes.**

"**I do." I turned my head at Sam's words and suddenly—my ears began to ring. I could see the preacher's lips moving, and watched him as he instructed the two to kiss. Their lips soon touched and the whole chapel erupted into congratulatory claps and wolf whistles. I tried to smile, though it probably looked more like a grimace. I tried to clap too, but I took me a while to register how to do so. I looked over at Jacob who smiled at me halfheartedly.**

**I hated the pitiful looks everyone gave me. Some of them actually looked at me pissed off, as if saying "Take that look of your fucking face!" I thought the reception would be a whole lot better, but it was actually worse, especially when it came time for the first dance. I sat there. Alone. Once again. Well...not really. Jacob was beside me, bouncing what looked like a six year old Nessie.**

"**When are you leaving?" erupted the question from Jacob's lips, never taking his eyes off the couple on the dance floor.**

"**I'm just waiting for Gabi to call." I told him looking down at the phone in my hands.**

"**That soon huh?" I didn't say anything "Does Seth know?"**

"**He helped me pack." I told him with a small smile. I always knew I could count on Seth. I knew he just wanted to see me happy, and he knew that if it were the other way around, I'd do the same.**

"**And your mom?" I took a deep breath.**

"**What she doesn't know won't hurt her." **

"**Where are you going?"**

"**Gabi has a brother in New York. But you can't tell anyone where we're going! Not even Seth. I mean it Jacob.'' I said sternly.**

"**I won't. That's an Alpha's promise.**

"**Thank you."**

"**Just...call. Ok?" he asked looking over at me.**

"**I will. That's a beta's promise." he smiled at me and took my hand.**

"**I'll miss you Lee."**

"**Yea, well...you'll get over it." I said playfully and squeezed his hand slightly.**

"**Leah." I stiffened at the voice calling my name. My eyes slightly widened and Jacob's jaw locked. I took a deep breath and turned to look at him.**

"**What?" I asked coldly.**

"**Care to dance?" I looked back at Jacob and he nodded slightly before motioning me to go with him. I sighed heavily and placed my cell phone in Jacob's hand. **

"**_Let me know_" I mouthed at him and looked back at _him_. "Alright." I answered, he extended his hand toward me and I took it reluctantly standing up off my seat. He led me towards the dance floor and I chewed on my lip as the slow song began.**

"**I hope you don't mind." he told me softly, taking my waist and my hand.**

**_How do I get through one night without you  
_****_If I had to live without you  
_****_What kind of life would that be  
_****_I need you in my arms  
_****_Need you to hold  
_****_You're my world, my heart, my soul,  
_****_If you ever leave  
_****_Baby you would take away everything good in my life_**

"**Why—You asked for our song?" I asked as tears began to sting my eyes. He nodded and I sighed, placing my hand on his shoulder. We began to move slowly side to side, and suddenly it was just me and him on the dance floor. If there were any other couples dancing around us, they were invisible to me. It was just me...and Sam.**

"**You look beautiful." he told me.**

"**Thank you." the redness creeped up my cheeks.**

"**I'm so sor—" **

"**Don't" I cut him off quickly "I know. God if you tell me that one more time I swear I'll explode. Besides, It's a little too late now." I said looking up to meet his eyes.**

"**I love you Leah. Please understand that."**

"**I do." I felt a huge lump form in my throat. "I love you too Sam. I always have, and I always will."**

"**Lee Lee." he whispered pressing me closer to him kissing my head softly before resting his cheek on it. I closed my eyes and placed my head on his chest, not caring what other people thought it looked like.**

"**Leah." I opened my eyes and took my head off Sam's chest.**

"**What is it?" I asked looking at Jacob.**

"**Gabi's outside. She's all set"**

"**Gabi? Leah, what's going on?" Sam asked confused**

**"Alright." I said pulling away from him, completely ignoring his question "Well, I already said my goodbyes to Seth." I told Jacob and began to walk to the door side by side.**

"**Goodbyes? Wait what's going on Leah?" Sam asked following suit. We stepped outside and I turned to Jacob.**

"**Thank you Jacob. For everything. For letting me join your pack, for listening when nobody else would. It's been great." I told him with a smile and kissed his cheek before hugging him tightly.**

"**I'll really miss you Leah." he whispered into my hair hugging me tightly **

"**Take care of Seth and mom for me." I told his as I pulled away "And take care of yourself."**

"**You too." he said teary eyed. I smiled and walked toward the idling car.**

"**Wait! Lee where are you going?" Sam asked, taking my wrist tightly, fearing the worst. I turned to him and immediately hugged him tightly. **

"**I love you Sam. I always have, and I always will." I repeated softly in his ear. I pulled away slightly and pressed my lips softly to his. He didn't refuse them. He kissed me passionately, letting me know he understood what what I was about to do. I tangled my hands in his hair and stood on my tippy toes, as he took my waist tightly. A few moments later I pulled away for air. He held me. I pressed my forehead against his and furrowed my eyebrows...tears escaping down my cheeks. **

"**Forever and always." He whispered his voice cracking. I pressed my lips to his once again before pulling away from him completely."No, wait." He grabbed my wrist tightly "You can't go." he begged with furrowed eyebrows. I pulled my wrist from him.**

"**Goodbye Sam." I said walking backwards toward the car. I waved slightly looking at Jacob's tear stained face behind him. I bumped gently into the car and I took the handle looking at the love of my life and my best friend stand before me. I looked away quickly, a sob escaping my lips as I pulled on the handle and opened the door. I got in as fast as I could and closed the door. I put on my seat belt and sighed heavily resting my head back on the seat I looked out the window and saw my little brother—sobbing at Jacob's side.**

"**Are you ok?" Gabi asked me concerned.**

"**No." I whispered shaking my head as I tried to stop the tears "Let's go."**

**I sobbed all the way to New York City.**

_**And tell me now  
**__**How do I live without you**__**  
want to know  
**__**How do I breathe without you  
**__**If you ever go  
**__**How do I ever, ever survive  
**__**How do I  
**__**How do I  
**__**How do I live  
**__**Without you, there'd be no sun in my sky  
**__**There'd be no world left for me  
**__**And I, oh baby, I don't know what I would do  
**__**I'd be lost if I lost you  
**__**If you ever leave  
**__**Baby you would take away everything real in my life.**_

_**

* * *

**_AU: Hope you liked it. It was kind of heartbreaking to write this scene. Originally it wasn't even going to be in the story but i just started writing it one day and so I'm happy it made it in :D Also, i don't remember if i said this in the previous chapter but I'm a fashion designer. I'm had a fellow fashion designer read what i have of the story so far and she said "I feel like you don't go into description too much, like about her dress you know?" Yes i know :) There's a wonderful reason for that. I'll be drawing every single outfit, well all the ones that stand out, and i will post links to those pictures in my profile, so look out for those. Reviews are much loved!!!


	3. Franklin

*****BEFORE YOU GET EXTREMELY CONFUSED! Let me explain. I know I've been away for a while. I'm sorry you guys, I had a serious case of writer's block. I didn't really like where the story was going, and the character I had introduced, which you all know as Connor. I put him in there by impulse and it completely derailed the storyline I had in mind. I've had some time to think it over, and thanks to a little thing I like to call roleplaying, my creative juices started flowing again and I decided to basically rewrite the last three chapters of the story. **

**Now this chapter hasn't changed much but it **_**has **_**changed, so I suggest you read it again. Leah's character wasn't exactly acting the way I wanted her to act and now thanks to the little tweaks I made, I'm back on track. Hopefully I'll be able to update more often now that I'm back in the writing mood. It's definitely a difficulty when you suffer from procrastination. If I had a machine that scanned all my notebooks, I would definitely update every week! But I don't, so be patient. I **_**will **_**finish this story. I don't exactly how or when it's going to end but it'll be done. But again, be patient. **_**Please! **_**Thanks for all of those who reviewed, hope you like these changes, and send me some feedback! Remember, BOLD=Flashback.**

* * *

"You got that article Clearwater?"

I snapped out of my daze and shook my head slightly "Yea! Just give me a minute!"

"Now!"

"Okay! Okay! Jeez don't get your panties in a knot." I whispered to myself not wanting to get fired. I pressed print and turned to get the freshly printed papers out of the printer.

"You have it yet?"

Yes. Here you go." I answered handing her the papers with a smile.

"You're lucky I like you." she told me scanning the paper over. "This is some good stuff Clearwater. Who knew you were so good in the advice column. Especially this heartbreak stuff. You would have been handy during my first two divorces." I raised my eyebrows and smiled.

"So...can I go?" I asked hopeful.

She sighed heavily "Yea. You can go."

"Yes! Thank you!" I said standing up and grabbing my bag as she walked out.

"Hey Leah." the receptionist called peeking her head in my small office. "Someone's asking for you on line two. They say it's important, and Gabriella's waiting for you out here.

"Okay thanks. Oh and could you tell Gabi to come in here? Thanks." I picked up the phone and pressed the _LINE 2_ button. "Hello?"

"Leah?"

"Yes, who's this?"

"Come on. Are you telling me you don't recognize your little brother's voice?"

"Seth?" I shrieked.

"Well that's more or less the reaction I was hoping for." he said with a chuckle.

"Oh my—Holy Crap! You sound so much older, Seriously! I didn't recognize your voice." I said with a laugh.

"Nice to hear you laugh."

"I know." I said with a hint of sadness, followed by a long pause. "Wait is there something wrong? Are you okay?" I asked, suddenly hysterical, my voice higher by an octave.

"Hey! No, No calm down!" he ordered laughing again.

"I'm sorry, but the last time I talked to you on the phone, you weren't exactly the bearer of good news." I explained seriously.

"**Hello?"**

"**Leah?"**

"**Seth? What's up?" I asked, preoccupied on writing a paper.**

"**Leah...mom got sick. She was in the hospital." he told me sniffling softly.**

"**Well—is she okay?" I asked now paying full attention to what he was saying. I hadn't exactly kept in touch with my mother. All she did was talk about, and compare me to her favorite niece. Sam's perfect little bride, Emily. I called Seth more often, to know how things were, how he was doing, and to make sure he was getting his ass to school. Apparently mom spent most of her time at Charlie Swan's house most of the time. **

"**N—No." his words were followed by loud sobs.**

"**Seth. Shh...calm down. Now tell me what's wrong."**

"**Mom's dead Leah."**

"I'm sorry I don't call more often." he said apologetic, snapping me out of the horrifying memory.

"Hey, I've got a phone too. I'm sorry." I apologized "So...why _did_you call?" Gabi came in the room and tapped her watch impatiently. Sticking my tongue out at her was my only source of response.

"Jake's getting married." I could imagine Seth's grin on the other side of the phone.

"To who?"

"Who else?" he asked as if I were mentally ill.

"Nessie? What is she, seven?"

"Well...technically." I scrunched my face in disgust.

"That's really creepy."

"Yea, I know! But she looks like she's in her twenties already. Besides she's the one tired of waiting, so Jasper went to that J. Jenks guy and got Ness a birth certificate. Now she's officially 22.

"Wow."

"Yea. So as Jake's _temporary_ second in command, and as a groomsmen, I called to invite you. On his behalf of course. He's here running around like a chicken without a head."

"Groomsmen?"

"Yup."

"Aww. I love seeing you in a tux." I smiled widely.

"Yea, well, I've been trying to persuade Alice to get rid of them. Quil and Embry aren't too keen on the idea either"

"Oh come on. You know you are _never_going to win against her."

"True. So you'll come?"

I contemplated on that idea for a minute. I hadn't been home since I left which was six years ago. I wasn't sure if I was ready, but I did miss Seth, and Jacob, and Billy. "Yea." I sighed "I'll go" I whispered, and looked up at Gabi. There was no way in hell I was doing this alone. "Can you reserve two seats?"

"Two seats? Are you—do you have a boy—"

"No. the second seat is for Gabi. Remember her? Besides what if I did have a boyfriend, what's so wrong about that, it's not like I can't get—"

"Hey, relax. I was just asking."

"Sorry.

"So the second seat is for Gabi. Wait...Gabi, Gabriella? Your friend from high school."

"The very same."

"She's with you?"

"Well she was here in New York before me. She's the one I left with remember?"

"So that's where you are huh? New York." _Shit._

I sighed heavily "Yea."

"So are you going to be able to get here in two weeks?"

"Yea Seth, it's called an airplane." I joked "So, wedding's is in two weeks?"

"Yea. Two weeks from today. The 11th."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

"Bye sis."

"Bye." I said and hung up the phone with a heavy sigh.

"Seth called?"

"Yea." I said, the fact that I had just been on the phone with my brother, barely sinking I. I looked up at her after a long awkward silence.

"Sooo...where are we going?"

"Back to good old La Push." I answered with fake enthusiasm as I got up grabbing my bag from my desk.

"God. Mom's going to be super excited." she stated sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Are you ready? To face everything I mean. To face Sam?"

"Why wouldn't I be? I mean he's a married man. Besides I'm completely over him."

"Oh yea. Sure." she said in a sarcastic tone, and a smirk.

"Let's just go, ok?" I asked looking at her irritated "I would like to enjoy _our _weekend off. God only knows when that'll happen again."

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Can I just have the Grilled Chicken Caesar please?

"And for you?" the waiter asked me.

"Oh, umm, Mushroom ravioli please."

"Ok, I'll be back with your orders soon."

"So are you truly ready to do this? We learned to be apart from our families. Now _I'm_ in better conditions, but are you?"

"What do you mean _better conditions_?" I asked frowning. She raised her eyebrows and shot me a look that screamed '_are-you-serious?_' "Look. It's no big deal. We'll just go, come back, and that'll be the end of that. "i said taking a drink of my iced tea.

"Are you serious? What about Seth? You're just going to tell him Hello, Goodbye, and walk out of his life for _another_six years?" she asked angrily, while I just rubbed my forehead. "he's practically and orphan Leah! He was just 16 when your mother died! You didn't even go to the funeral! How do you think he felt? How do you think he feels now? He might be _Happy-Go-Lucky_ Seth all you want on the outside, but you can't even imagine what he must feel like on the inside. He's lost _everything_. His Father, his Mother, _and_ his older sister!"

I looked up glaring at her. "Are you done lecturing me?" I asked "You think I don't know all of this already?" I snapped. I swear, if I were wasn't in control of my temper I would of phased then and there.

"I'm sorry." she apologized "But you can't do this to him. He's the only family, well besides your cousin, that you have left. Leah—you're my best friend, and I agree with you on most things, but I don't agree with you just abandoning your younger, and may I remind you, _only_ brother."

"Yea I know. I just..." I sighed "It's hard, going back to everything and everyone you know? It's not easy. It might be easier for you because you didn't grow up there. No offense. And I've been doing so well. I want to be the old Leah. The nice, happy, supportive one. Seth deserves that much."

"You already are Leah." she told me with a reassuring smile.

"Here you go ladies." the waiter said placing out plates in front of us.

"Thank you." Gabi and I said in unison.

"My biggest worry though, is that Seth, Jake, or a combination of the two, will try and suck me into the whole pack thing again. They're going to shove me into it again, I just know it! But I am _done _with PHASING. It's been like what? Five years since I last phased?" I asked picking up my fork and beginning to eat.

"Yea, I remember that freak out you had when we first got here. Roger and I looked for you everywhere, until we finally found you wearing your birthday suit in the middle of central park." she laughed, instantly turning red.

"Ha, ha, very funny." I said sarcastically. "But I'm not sure I can phase anymore. My menstrual cycle is back to normal, along with my body temperature, and not to mention I've obviously grown."

"Well it's not like you're going to go off and start fighting side by side with the guys again anyway." she said beginning to eat as well.

"You know what we have to do now, right?" I asked.

"Shop for dresses?" she answered with a small smile. Honestly, Gabi always knew what I was thinking before I even opened my mouth to say it. We're like twins separated at birth, except she's a Jewish white girl, and I'm Quileute.

"Ooooh yea."

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"I don't want to look like a slut!" I yelled "This dress is for petites! Half of my ass is going to be hanging out!" I tossed the dress at her.

"Oh come on! It show's off your legs! And let me tell you, any girl, including myself, would kill for your legs."

"I know, but I don't want to go back home dressed like this, and give all of La Push and half of forks the impression that I turned into some skank." I told her. "hand me the next dress that is _not_ petite."

"Fine." she said with a pout "Oh this one's very cute. Here." I took the dress and quickly put it on.

"Okay. I sighed and turned to face Gabi. "How do I look?" I asked looking at her with a wide smile.

"Oh...my...God!" she said laughing. "You look amazing! Really! And that color! It looks great on your skin tone.

"Okay, get dressed." I told her. "And hurry, we have to go home and pack.

"Okay, Okay. She said turning to take off her dress choice. "What time's the plane leaving?"

"6:45 am." I said with a groan and heavy sigh. I changed back into my jeans and blouse, and grabbed my purse. So that means we have to be there at_least_ at five."

"How long will the flight take?" she asked with a groan as she pulled the dress over her head.

"Six hours. Then the drive from Seattle to La Push is probably going to be another four hours." We took both dresses to the counter and paid them, before heading out of the boutique and to my car.

"Well then, I hope La Push is ready for us." Gabi said with a wide smile as we took off towards the apartment.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"I love this rental car. Maybe I'll get one just like it when we get back home. "Gabi said driving the rented Mazda down the road. "Oh would you stop playing with that damn ring already? I'm nervous enough as it is!" she said frustrated.

"You're nervous?" I asked with raised eyebrows" At least you don't have to go to a ceremony where practically all of your family will face you after not seeing or talking to them for six years!" I said and bit my lip.

"I'm sorry I can't be there with you, but you bet I'll be there drinking all the free alcohol with you at the reception." she tried to cheer me up with a grin.

"Your mom is so nosy." I muttered.

"Hello! We live, well lived, in a population of like four-hundred people! It hasn't raised that much since we left! So the news of Jake's marriage was the talk of the town, and since he's very close to you, mom knew you would come and drag me with you. You can't blame her for wanting to see me ASAP. I'm her youngest, and only daughter.

"Whatever." I mumbled. "She can dress up Roger in a dress and call him Regina." She rolled her eyes

"Why do you wear that ring anyway? It's been like seven or eight years since you guys were together." she said eying the ring on my left hand.

"**I want to give you something."**

"**Oh yea?" I said lifting my head off his bare chest. I sat up and pulled the sheets up to my bare chest. "What is it?" I asked excitedly. He sat up too, covering his exposed lap before reaching down for his jeans. He dug around in his pocket then turned back to me. Between his thumb and index finger, he held a simple silver band with an infinite symbol in the front, which had small diamonds encrusted on it.**

"**Don't freak out, it's a promise ring." he said, his smile illuminated by the light the moon shone through my window. "I want you to wear it, that way I'll always be with you. I promise to marry you one day Lee. To start a family with you, give you everything you need and want. I love you Lee Lee. Forever and Always." he told me, his eyes warm.**

"**I promise you I'll always wear it, and I'll always love you. I don't know what I'd do without you. I'd probably go hysterical." I said with a giggle. "You're the one Sam." I whispered. He smiled widely and showed me the ring. On the inside, the words **_'__Forever and Always: Sam and Leah' _**were scripted. I smiled brightly and watched as he placed the ring on my finger.**

"**I'll never leave you Lee. And if I do just remember I'll always come back to you. I promise you."**

What a load of bull. I hadn't even realized I was playing with the damn thing. I looked down at it and frowned. "Maybe you should take it off. It doesn't exactly hold the best of memories." I scoffed

"No shit."

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Alright, so you promise? Not a minute before, not a minute after!" I asked firmly

"Yes! I'll be here at eight-o-clock on the dot." Gabi promised a last time and leaned over to hug me. "try and have a good time okay?"

"Yea,Yea." I said with no enthusiasm as I got out of the car. "I'll see you later ok? DO **NOT** BE LATE." I said sternly once last time.

"I won't." she said with a smile. I closed the car door and waved slightly as I watched her drive away.

"Okay Leah, this is it. Take a deep breath." I breathed in. _Let it out._ I did as I told myself. ''And smile" I whispered before doing so.

"Leah!" I heard a delicate bell-like voice call, making me turn to the luxurious house.

"Alice?" I said looking at the obvious "Hi."

"Your dress!" she said rushing to me. "It's amazing!" I smiled "Just as I'd seen it."

"What?" I asked with a frown. When she looked away I raised my eyebrows and shook my head "Anyway, I knew that you were in charge of the wedding, as usual, so I knew I had to look good."

"And you do. I've never seen you in anything but cut-off sweats and torn up t-shirts. Now come! The ceremony's about to begin and..." she looked down

"And..._what_?" I asked suspiciously.

"Uh..come on. Walk with me." she said leading me towards the house. We walked up the steps and into the beautifully decorated house. I watched as she picked up a large bouquet of flowers, of course Alice would be a bridesmaid. Perfect. All I had to do was sneak in after Alice went in.

"Here." she said holding out a part of her bouquet to me.

"Ok, I'm really confused now. Why do I need this?"

"You're part of the wedding party."

"_What?_" she quickly shoved the flowers in my hands and pushed me though the double doors, onto the aisle where familiar faces were lined up.

"Wait Alice!" I whispered urgently and turned to look for her, but she was already formed in the front, linking arms with S—.

"Hey Lee." I turned my hear toward the newly familiar voice and smiled widely.

"Seth!" I whispered excitedly and hugged my little brother, now a much taller grown man, tightly.

"I missed you sis." he said into my hair, making me hug him even tighter.

"I know, I'm sorry." I whispered pulling away slowly before looking up at him.

"By all means don't even tear up, or do you want to prevent ruining your make up?"

"Jeez, since when are you so sensitive?" I asked sarcastically.

"Hmm well, you can always blame Ellie." he said with a chuckle.

"Ellie? Elizabeth? Your girlfriend from middle school?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah, she's my girlfriend, well more like fiancee." a sheepish smile formed on his lips.

"What? Why didn't you tell me?" I whispered urgently "Hey wait! That's sooo not fair! My little brother isn't supposed to be getting married before _me_." I pouted playfully

"Sorry sis. He said with a shrug. "Beat ya to it."

"Nah it's alright. You should probably keep her. I don't think anyone in their right mind would agree to marry you. She's a keeper." I teased

"It's starting." Alice whispered eagerly as the piano began playing on cue. I hooked my arm under Seth's and looked forward.

I took a deep breath, closed my eyes for a second, and exhaled, opening my eyes again. We began to walk slowly, my knees feeling weak. This wasn't exactly what I expected when I said I was coming back home. I thought I'd just come and make an appearance at my best friend's wedding, not actually participate in it. I looked up and the first thing I saw was Jacob's face, though I could hear some of the Quileute people murmuring my name and making comments as I walked by with Seth. Jacob's face was lit up so brightly, that I swear he could be used as a fucking glow stick! I didn't want to take my eyes away from him, afraid that I might see another familiar face and have a freakout. When Seth and I got to the front, Jake looked at me with that super white smile of his. I smiled back widely and stopped in front of him. I quickly pulled away from Seth and hugged Jacob tightly.

"You came." he whispered into my ear.

"Well I could miss the day you actually got married. I thought it would never happen." I joked pulling away slowly. "I'll see you and the reception with your woman." I said smiling at him, before lining up with the rest of the bridesmaids who I saw were made up of; Alice, Rosalie, and those two sisters from the Denali clan.

Soon the wedding march began, everyone stood up and looked towards the top of the stairs, though I could still feel half the people's gaze's on me. Edward appeared at the top of the stairs, Reneesme, who looked absolutely stunning, hooked on his arm. They descended down the stairs, and waltzed the short distance down the aisle. I began to get that sick sense of deja vu, but I knew this day unlike my famous doomsday, would be filled with joy for my pack brother.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Dammit Gabi." I muttered shutting my cellphone. I stood by the back of the decorated garden wanting to avoid the glares of most Quileute people. They should all fucking build a fucking bridge, and get the fuck over it. Fuck! I had already talked to Billy. I'd forgotten how much I missed him, and now soon all of the Quileute reservation would know Leah, "the bitch" Clearwater was back. I wished my dad were here, I didn't know why, I just needed some parental comfort.

"Hey hot stuff. What are you doing over here all by yourself?" I felt a hand slap my ass.

"What the f—" I turned around quickly.

"Want something to drink?" Paul asked standing right in front of me, cocky as ever. I honestly didn't know how Rachel's been putting up with him all these years.

"Uhm...Sure. You buying?" I asked with a smirk, the familiarity of him washing away the uneasiness.

"Open bar." He winked "How've you been?" he asked me as we made our way to the refreshments table. "We've missed the years of pain and torture." he teased with a smirk. I rolled my eyes and picked up a glass of champagne from one of the waiters walking around with trays filled with them.

"Hey Sis." I turned around and smiled widely at Seth, a pretty brunette at his side.

"Hey." I hugged him and smiled at the girl.

"You remember Ellie right?"

"Yea, totally. I think she's perhaps the only girl that actually said yes when you asked her out.

"Shut up." he mumbled, his face turning red in embarrassment.

"Nice to see you back in town Leah." Ellie told me with a bright smile.

"Thanks. Seth told me the news about you two. Congratulations." I said, my eyes landing on the diamond ring on her left hand.

"Thank you, I'm very excited." she said with a giggle.

"You should have seen Seth the day she told him yes. He was literally ricocheting off the walls." Paul chimed in.

"Shut up." Seth said even more embarrassed.

"Oh, Isabelle and Alec just got here." she said looking toward the entrance of the garden. "I'll be right back, I'm going to go say hi. I'll be right back babe." she whispered, softly kissing Seth's lips. I smiled widely at them and watched as Ellie left.

"Seth?" Alice called, and Seth in return turned his body to talk to her.

"Where were you all these years?" Paul suddenly asked. Great, we were hitting that rough edge of our conversation already.

"New York."

"Why didn't you ever visit, or call, or even take a minute to write? Do you know how hard this has been on Seth? On all of us really." he said, a sharp edge to his voice.

"Of course I know, Paul. I'm not stupid."

"Well that's a pretty stupid way to take things." I sighed heavily and looked away from him "We really _did_ miss you Leah."

"Wow, I never thought I'd hear _The_ Paul Gordon talk with sincerity in his voice." I said trying to lighten the mood.

"Well..." he cleared his throat and stood up straighter, his infamous 'I'm a hot ass dick.' look back on his face "Don't get used to it."

I smiled widely and heard my phone go off "Oh, hold on. I quickly dug it out of my clutch and hit the talk button. "Gabi?"

"Hey! I'm sorry I'm late, but I'm out here at the entrance of the backyard, where are you?" I looked around through the crowd and spotted her.

"Oh I see you, I'll be right there. I closed my phone, only to have it knocked out of my hand.

"Seth!" I yelled glaring at him as he passed between Paul and me.

"What the hell man?" Paul yelled as he picked up my phone, handing it to me. I looked up at Seth and frowned. He had the weirdest look on his face..."Oh Shit..." Paul said, his tone drastically changing.

"What? What's wrong?" I asked looking from Paul back to Seth who seemed to be walking, as if hypnotized towards...Gabi? But why did he have that look on his face...it reminded me of...Sam. Sam when he first met..."Oh fuck". I whispered and looked at Paul finally understanding what was happening. I furrowed my eyebrows and quickly scanned the crowd for Ellie. She was walking towards Seth looking confused, broken, and I recognized that face all too well. I worse the same expression when I fell victim and lost the love of _my_ life to because of our cruel heritage. "Oh no." I whispered, my heart for the soon to be heartbroken girl, beating faster than a hummingbird's wings. "Seth!" I yelled beginning to walk towards my brother.

"Leah?" I heard Gabi call as she tippy toed to get her head over the crowd in search of me. I tried getting to Seth, but someone always got in the way. I was sure the Cullen's backyard wasn't that big, but it seemed to go on forever. I looked at Seth and saw Ellie, now walking behind him, failing miserably in attempt to tug him towards her.

He wouldn't budge.

"Seth! Please talk to me! Come one why are you acting like you can't see me?" I stopped where I stood and felt a huge lump form in my throat.

"Jacob!" I called frantic.

"Forget it." a deep familiar voice said behind me "You know we can't do anything about it." I closed my eyes, tightly clenched my jaw.

"Yea. After all, you are the expert in all this crap aren't you Sam?"

_And when we get home,  
I know we won't be home at all,  
This place we live,  
It is not where we belong,  
And I Miss who we were  
In the town that we could call our own  
Going back to get away  
After everything has changed,  
Everything has changed._

_It's taking up our time_  
_We can't go back_  
_We can't go back at all_  
_It's taking up our time_  
_We can't go back_  
_We can't go back at all_  
_Could you remind me of a time_  
_When we were so alive?_  
_Do you remember that?_

* * *

**_-ShotAcrossTheSky-_**


	4. The Trick To Life

**If you're still reading this; THANK YOU SO MUCH. I really appreciate that you guys are still following the story even though I'm horrible at keeping up with it. Like I said in the previous chapter: I WILL finish this story. It's a personal challenge, and honestly I myself would love to see where this story is going to end. For now, I'm kind of winging it until I get used to the new characters and plotline that I've created.**

**I'm keeping the new character who you all knew as Connor, but his new name is Daniel and he is not British. I just go through crazy fangirl phases and get the ache to fit all my fandoms into this story, but thanks to Sese [a.k.a-My real life Gabi Davis] I've learned to control it a bit. Though I do have to inform you guys that Gabi is actually a crossover character from the RENT Musical verse. She is not cannon, but Sese made her sister of Roger Davis, hence the last name and the Roger references. It was all set in roleplay. If I explained the whole thing here I'd need another chapter. Though I do think I might do a one-shot of when they first met…if she hasn't written it yet. I call shots on that one-shot Ses!**

**Enjoy! And don't forget to review!**

* * *

"Lee—"

"Leah!" Jacob's voice cut Sam's words as I saw him push his way towards me. "What's going on? What happened?"

"Seth. It's uh—he..." I stuttered.

"Spit it out!"

"He imprinted." I looked up at him.

"Oh who?" he asked as a deep crease formed between his brows.

"My friend, Gabi. I asked her to come with me and—"

"Where is she?"

"Over there." I pointed Gabi out.

"Shit, Ness!" he called out to her and she came immediately.

"What is it?" she asked concerned, noticing the hard set of his jaw.

"Seth's imprinted. Take Ellie, ask Kim and Emily to go with you. Explain this to her." He told her kissing her forehead before letting her go. Nessie looked back at me, sympathy in her eyes. She understood, and she knew that my brother doing what happened to me, to someone else hurt. Like a bitch.

"What are you going to do Jacob?" Of course Sam couldn't make decisions. Seth wasn't part of his pack. He wasn't our Alpha.

"Leah, ask your friend to leave. I'm Sorry, but we have to keep Seth under control. Come." He took my wrist and led me towards the entrance, pushing oblivious guests aside. When we finally reached Seth, Jake took him tightly by the arm, preventing him from getting too close to Gabi. I quickly walked to her and placed my hands at her wrists.

"Gabi, listen to me. You have to leave."

"What? Why? I thought you wanted me to be here, you said you couldn't—"

"I know what I said, but you have to get out of here."

"Let go of me! You can't do this!" Seth yelled as Paul helped Jake restrain him. Everyone suddenly quieted and stared.

"Gabi, you can't be here ok? Please listen to me." I pleased with furrowed eyebrows.

"What's going on Leah? You're really starting to freak me out." She asked, her eyes widened by evident fear.

"I know Gabi, I'm really sorry. But please, go back to your mother's house. I'll call you later and explain everything. I promise." I said lightly pushing her out of the backyard.

"Fine. I'll go." She said looking over my shoulder at Seth "Leah…please be careful."

"I will. Now go. Hurry." I urged. I watched as she got in the car and took off before turning back to Seth. The members of both packs were standing around Seth Jacob, and Paul. They went into the house, and out to the front yard to where I followed.

"Calm down Seth!" Jacob ordered sternly.

"How can I be calm when you're keeping me here like a fucking animal? Nobody denied you the right to be with Nessie!" he yelled thrashing around in Jacob and Paul's grip. "Just let me go man! Let go of me!"

"Seth!" I yelled catching his attention. He was fuming, his tanned face red and twisted in anger. I didn't even recognize him. He was always so chipper and charismatic, now…now he was a completely different person…a stranger. "What about Ellie huh?" I asked "She's your fiancée Seth." I sighed heavily and looked down shaking my head trying to keep calm. "You can't do this to her." I shook my head again as I looked at him "You remember how I felt when I was in Ellie's place all those years ago. You heard me cry myself to sleep every single night. You saw how I locked myself in my room for days until dad dragged my ass out." He hung his head

"Leah…you don't under—"

"I do understand! That's why I am asking you to calm down and come to reason!"

"Come to reason? Leah, you can't tell me who I can or cannot be with! You know I can't help this! Besides, why do you suddenly care about me now?"

"Please Seth, you're my little brother. I've always cared about you and what you do."

"Really? Well if you care so much, why weren't you here when mom died?"

I opened my mouth to retort, but no words came out. I had no words to tell him

"You left me here…alone. You left me when I needed you the most. How dare you come back here and pretend like everything's fine and dandy?" he asked angrily, his nostrils flared.

"You're the one that called me! If you didn't want to deal with me then you shouldn't have called in the first place."

"Then I don't want you here. Leave! I called because Jake really wanted you here. But no one else wants you here. People are whispering behind your back, giving you angry glares, saying to each other: The Harpy bitch of La Push is back." I clenched my jaw. I knew he was angry, that's why he kept talking, throwing insults at anyone he came across. Of course I had to be the idiot to step in front of him, and I couldn't help but believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, after all they did hold some truth to them.

"Go to hell." I said between clenched teeth before stepping out of my heels and reaching to grab them.

"What are you doing Leah?" I heard Jacob ask.

"You must be crazy if you think I'm going to stand here taking shit from my little brother, all because stupid fate has turned his brain to mush." I said glaring at Seth, and then finally looked at Jacob "I don't think this was the best of ideas." I grabbed my heels. "Tell Ness I'm sorry for ruining her wedding." and for the first time in a very long time, I ran away barefooted.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Leah?" I faintly smiled as I stood on Gabi's porch, my forehead covered in sweat "Come in!" she said shaking herself out of her stunned state. She took my hand and quickly guided me to her room

"Hi Mrs. Davis, nice to see you again." I told her mother, who was sitting in the living room watching some sappy film on Lifetime, before Gabi practically shoved me into her room "You know, you've got quite a grip Gabs." The girl had left my wrist red. I had to rub it to ease some of the burning.

"What happened back there Leah?" she asked.

"Seth just…had a little temper tantrum that's all."

"That's all? Leah you looked—"

"It was nothing Gabi, really." I sat on her bed "I just didn't want you to get hurt. I mean look what Sam did to Emily." She came to stand in front of me and crossed her arms. Uh Oh.

"I'm your best friend. You honestly think I can't tell when you're lying?"

"I'm telling you the truth. It wasn't a big deal."

"Leah!"

"Fine! Seth Imprinted." I looked at her with my jaw clenched

"What?

"You wanted to know. Now you do."

"Who did he imprint on?" I looked away from her and chewed nervously on my bottom lip. "That's why you wanted me to leave." She realized "He imprinted on…"she sat down beside me. "Shit." She said barely above a whisper. "What are we going to do Leah?" she asked concerned.

"You're going to stay here. I'll get us some plane tickets; we'll be back in New York tomorrow night. Until then, you can't leave this house."

"What? You can't have me under house arrest. My mother will drive me crazy! Even though it's only a few hours you know h—"

"Well figure something to occupy your time!" I snapped "But there's no way in hell you're leaving this house." I stood up and grabbed my shoes off the floor "Seth's engaged to his girlfriend from middle school Gabi." I said looking at her "I'm not letting this happen again," I stood up "So please, stay here, pack what you've unpacked. I'll pick you up tomorrow morning." I opened the door and left without even closing the door.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

Nothing had changed Everything still looked the same, right down to dad's keys hanging on a hook beside the front door, his work boots on the floor directly underneath them. Only the thick layer of dust indicated the time's passing. Guess Seth hadn't paid a visit to home sweet home ever since he moved in with Jake and Billy.

Not even my room had changed. Everything was kept exactly the way I had left it; the lavender walls, the twinkle light that ran along the edges of the walls, the collage of photos on my headboard, the photo of dad and I taped onto my vanity mirror, I ran my fingers over the old photo, wiping the layer of dust that made the colors dull. I smiled softly. How did my life turn to shit?

I did my best to have a normal life these past six years. But deep down I always knew my past would catch up to me. I would never be able to get away from it, never be able to lead a normal life, to meet a nice guy, marry him, and have kids, a house, and a white picket fence. Who would want someone who was damaged? Someone who was broken beyond repair?

The sound of glass breaking brought me out of my thoughts. I quickly turned my head to the door and frowned. I poked my head out into the hallway, but there was no one there. I slowly walked down the hall and down the stairs, staying close to the edge to keep the floorboards from creaking. I looked into the living room, the moonlight illuminating it. One of the curtains was moving, but then I realized that what was moving it was the cool air blowing through the window. So it had been broken. I looked around quickly, looking for any sign of a rock, or maybe even a person being inside. My clutch rang, making me jump. I quickly walked to the coffee table where I had placed it and picked it up quickly, the zipper getting caught in the lining. I felt someone move behind me, but when I turned…there was no one there. I pulled at the zipper harder, not caring if it broke, before feeling someone's breath blow the hair behind my ear. The phone stopped ringing. A chill ran down my spine. I swallowed hard and slowly turned.

"Need a little help sweetheart?" the man who stood before me asked.

I ran.

The front door was still unlocked. I quickly ran out, not even bothering to look back and see if the man was following me. Where could I go? Everyone in the reservation was at the Cullen's celebrating Jake's wedding.

_Run. Run. Think. FAST!_

I wasn't like before. I wasn't a wolf. I could still run fast, that's the way I'd kept in shape. Gabi and I had our daily run through central park. But the speed I ran at now didn't compare to the supernatural speed of I had before.

"Gotcha!" he yelled behind me as he gave me a shove. I fell, hard. I put my hands out to keep myself from impacting face-first on the gravel. I scrambled to my hands and knees crawling to get away before getting up to run, but suddenly I was on my back. My hands were held by someone who was at the same time straddling my waist. "You're quite the runner there. Not nearly as fast as I thought you'd bee, but good enough. I looked around wildly seeing two men stand on either side of him; the one on the left had his arms crossed over his chest, a smirk slapped onto his face. The one on the right had his hands formed tightly into fists that hung on either side, his jaw tight and his face set in a frown.

"No! Stop, let me go!" I yelled wriggling around underneath him.

"That's enough Carl." The man with a set jaw spoke up.

"Aww, you going soft on us Daniel?" the man holding me down, which I now knew as Carl replied.

"Let me go you son of a bitch." I said through clenched teeth.

"Feisty little bitch aren't ya?"

"I said enough Carl!" the one called Daniel said louder.

"Relax Dan, I just want to have some fun with her before we turn her in to the boss. You wanna have some fun, don't ya baby?" he looked down at me. I clenched my jaw and turned my head she brought his face closer to me mine. He ran his nose over my cheek taking my scent in, and next thing I knew…

Daniel lunged at him, knocking him off me. I quickly turned on my stomach and got up. I looked at Daniel and frowned. He was fighting the other two off. He was…helping me. I looked around for anything useful. The least I could do was help, it wasn't a fair fight if it was two against one. I turned to see if I could gather any big rocks, only finding a few nearby. I gathered them in my arms, and when I turned around Daniel and the others weren't there anymore. Well at least not their human selves. In their place I saw three large wolves fighting, throwing bites at each other, snarling as they attacked.

"Oh no." I whispered as I let the rocks fall to the floor. I turned and ran immediately into the forest. Maybe by some miraculous chance Quil and Embry were out there, or Collin, Jared, hell even Paul. Did they even know there were other wolves in the reservation? They certainly weren't part of either pack, I had never before seen them in my entire life!

"Get back here!" I heard Carl scream, but only a few seconds after I heard growls coming after me. I turned seeing Carl coming at me in his wolf form, the other two right on his tail. I was human now. I didn't think I would ever be clumsy running through the forest. But I was, especially when the only source of light was the moon filtering through the trees. And I fell, I didn't know what I fell on by I'd fallen on something hard. I felt the hot liquid running down the side of my head. I didn't bother getting up, I couldn't my whole body ached and I was exhausted. I looked up seeing the stars above the tall trees, shining brighter and brighter as each second passed. But as quickly as they went bright, they turned dark and that's when I heard him.

"Leah." My father called out. And suddenly, the universe faded around me, leaving me in the dark, cold…

Alone.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Dad!" I bolted upright immediately wishing I hadn't.

"Hey relax, lay back." It was him. Daniel. The wolf that had tried to stop Carl. He was sitting in front of me. I gasped scooting backwards as far as I could.

"What do you want from me?" I asked holding my hand up to my head.

"I was only helping" he replied bringing his arms up in defense "See?" he said showing me the rag soaked in blood. "When you fell you hit your head pretty bad. I fought off Carl and Alex and brought you here." My eyes moved around the dark cave. We were still in the forest, that much was visible through the cave opening. But…where in the forest were we? How long had I been out? The sun was shining brightly though the tress. Must be morning.

"You're taking me back to your boss or whatever. Your Alpha right?" I asked with a frown.

"Well yes but, things got out of hand and I d—"

"Leah!" I head the familiar voice scream out.

"Crap. Your scent is so overwhelming…I didn't smell 'em coming."

"Leah!" the voice screamed again full of desperation and concern.

"Call out to them. I won't keep you here." I looked at Daniel. He didn't seem like a bad guy at all. Carl, he's the who's face was filled with pure perversion and evil.

"I'm right here!" I called out, my eyes never leaving Daniel's.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"Which pack do you belong to? What do you want with Leah?" I flinched as Papa Leech finished suturing my head wound.

"You should be fine. Just a minor concussion, nothing a little aspirin can't take care of." Carlisle told me as he proceeded to clean up the bloody gauzes up.

"Thanks lee—Carlisle." I quickly corrected.

"No problem." He assured with a slight smile. Don't hesitate to call if you don't feel better." I nodded and watched as he took his medical bag, walking to Billy and speaking to him in a low voice.

"How are you feeling?" Paul asked as he walked into the kitchen.

"A little dizzy." I answered "How did you guys find me?" I asked as he hopped onto the kitchen counter sitting next to me.

"Jacob came looking for you early morning after receiving a call from Gabi. She told him you were supposed to pick her up and hadn't heard from you. The only place he thought you'd be was your house, so he came here looking for you. The combination of the broken window, wide open door, huge paw prints and the scent of unknown wolves set him off, so he immediately called Sam to tell him about it. We all went into the forest looking for you. Thanks to the blood your scent was stronger, so we followed it and…we found you." He said.

"Crap, Gabi!"

"Relax, Jacob called to tell her what'd happened. She said she'd be here soon."

"No, I specifically told her to stay home unless I told her otherwise."

"Why? Because of Seth?"

"How many times is this going to happen, Paul? Look what I became, heartless, bitter, scared. I can't let this happen now or ever again."

"It's not your duty to stop all of this you know."

"Well someone has to do something."

"Leah," he wrapped his arm around my shoulder."I think if anyone can do something about this whole imprint thing, it's you. You're stubborn enough to find a way. But you're not doing this to get Sam back are you?" he asked in a low voice.

"What! You must be out of your fucking mind." I said shrugging his arm off.

"Come on Leah. You can't tell me you're not in love with Sam anymore."

"As a matter a fact I can: I Do Not Love Sam."

"Lee, we were best friends when you and Sam started going out. I listened to you blabble on about how great Sam was every single day. That kind of devotion, of love, doesn't just go away." He said shaking his head.

"It does after six years."

"He's good." Embry said as he came into the kitchen. I looked away from Paul. "Nessie covered all of his history, Edward double checked. Daniel's a good guy."

"Can I go in and see him?" I asked.

"He's not a prisoner Leah. Go." Paul said hopping off the kitchen counter and headed towards the front door.

**\\\\\\\\\\\**

"I just—uh. I wanted to…What I meant to say,"

"Come on say it." He said with a small smile. I glared at him.

"Thanks. You know for saving me back there." I said looking down at my hands.

"Now that wasn't so hard to say now was it."

"If you really knew me you'd know exactly how hard it was for me to say that to you." I looked up at him. He was staring me. There was so much intensity in his gaze that it honestly freaked me out. Not it the 'Oh I'm going to stalk and kill you.' But in this other way that I had seen before, but didn't really recognize. I could help but stare back, and that's when I really saw him. The green tint in his hazel eyes, the strong jaw covered in scruff, the perfectly shaped cupid's bow.

"Hope we're not interrupting." I heard Sam say as he walked into the room. I quickly looked away and cleared my throat.

"No, just, we were just talking." I said looking up seeing Sam and Jake standing side by side. Paul was behind them leaning against the doorframe along with Jared, the rest of both packs were crammed in my narrow hallway outside the guest room "Where's Seth?" I asked. Jake let out a heavy breath and looked at me.

"I…Alpha ordered him to stay with Dad at his house."

"Oh." I said. I knew how much Jacob hated Alpha ordering us. But it had to be done. "So, why is everyone else here?"

"Well," Jacob started. "You were attacked by other shape shifters that do not belong to either pack. We need to know the reason."

"So Daniel here is going to tell us everything. Aren't you Daniel?" Sam added as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Sure." Daniel said.

"Where are you from?" Jake asked.

"Kansas, but I recently moved to Greenwich Village in New York."

"That's by Alphabet City." I spoke up.

"I know. I've been following you."

"You've been in New York all these years?" Sam asked.

"Why? What do you want from me?" I ignored Sam's question.

"My pack's been following you. Has been for the past month." He briefly looked down at his lap before looking at me. "A month ago you were in Central Park with your blonde friend and a blonde man." I frowned as I tried to remember the last time I was at Central Park with a man, because I knew the woman had to be Gabi.

"Oh, Roger." I realized "Gabi's brother."

"Yes, the brooding one with the leather jacket." He paused "Well my pack brother and I were following you. Central Park's really the only area of vegetation in the city." I nodded in agreement. There was a long pause. He looked at him lap again as if he were ashamed of something. "We were supposed to capture you, and bring you back to our Alpha."

"So you are on their side!" Sam roared as his body instinctively crouched, ready to attack. "You're not touching a single hair on her head! Do your hear me!" low growls could be heard from the rest of the guys.

"No!" Daniel stood up with his hands in front of him as if saying to stop. "I mean yes, I understand." He sighed "Look I'm new to this whole pack thing ok? I had always been on my own. Up until two months ago I didn't even know others like me existed! When I moved to New York, I found others like me. Getting her was like initiation. When I first joined I had to fight the other pack members. If you eliminate one of them, you get to take their place."

"You mean, kill one to become their replacement?" I asked.

"Yea." He nodded looking away. "I killed a member to take his place. I did. But damning a woman to a heartless man—that I couldn't do." He looked at me.

"Why does your Alpha want me?" I asked

"He caught your scent, and it was so strong. Our Alpha believes you're the perfect mate for him. That together you two can produce faster, stronger wolves. Apparently there have been other women, but none of them have survived. None of them have been able to produce the size of wolves he wanted. So…he kills them." I looked at him repulsed. "And then you came here, and we—they followed. When we got here I told them I wouldn't help, that I was going back, and well things didn't go over so well with our Alpha: Ethan." He said rubbing his neck where there were dark healing scars that clearly looked like claw marks. "So I went with Carl and that other idiot Jackson to get you. But they were wrong. They were all wrong. I didn't realize it until you bumped into me as you tried to run."

"What were they wrong about?"

"Your scent is strong, not only because you have strong reproducing genes, but because you're a wolf too." He locked his eyes with mine "We didn't know female wolves existed. That makes you twice as valuable to Ethan."

"I don't phase anymore." I shook my head "I haven't phased in over five years." I quickly said.

"Yes. But it's still in your blood Leah." Sam answered in a monotone voice.

"Exactly." Daniel agreed, his eyes never leaving mine. "He can't know you're a wolf Leah."

"So…" I finally said "There are wolves out there that are trying to capture me?" I asked dumbly.

"Yes." Daniel replied.

"How many?" Jacob asked.

"Nine." David looked at Jacob "There are more in New York. Our Beta: David is here. Ethan gave them two weeks to get Leah." He looked back at me. "If they don't succeed, the other ten wolves will come here led by Ethan. He won't stop . He'll kill everyone in your reservation if he has to, torture your family and close friends if it'll get you to surrender yourself. There's no stopping him. He'll do whatever it takes to have you Leah."

Great. I'm fucking dead.

_You'd kill for answers but learn to live with, _

_Questions, Who what why how and if, _

_I'll sit back detached tear our your hair, _

_Oh but on the contrary... _

_The trick to life is not to get too attached to it, _

_Everyone you love turns to dust, _

_You'd jump off the edge but you felt pushed, _

_By all that's unnecessary, _

_You tread but you're off on the wrong foot, _

_The trick to life is not to get too attached to it, _

_Don't get attached to, attached to life, _

_Don't get attached to, attached to life, _

_The trick to life is not to get too attached to it, _

_The trick to life is not to get too attached to it, _

_Don't look your life passed you by, _

_Cos you're too attached to it, _

_Don't look your life passed you by, _

_Cos you're too attached to it_

* * *

**_-ShotAcrossTheSky-_**


End file.
